Have you ever had the thought, “If I only could see the big picture, I would be at peace” or “if God would only show me the destination, the path forward would feel so much easier”? I think we have all felt that way at one time or another. High schoolers may feel that way about choosing a college or career path, single people wonder about getting married, and those in recovery long for a timeline and a place of freedom. Inquiring minds want to know, “where are we going? How long will it take? What is the path from here to there? Is that even what I want?” While it is not wrong to want the bigger picture, often that is not how life works. Our human minds yearn for clarity and understanding. We think that if we just had a little more information, it would make all the difference in our journey. God in His love and wisdom knows just the opposite. The truth is our human minds cannot handle a bird’s eye view of our lives.

If God had told me five years ago that I would be leading prayer ...

My family and I recently moved to Florida from Louisiana. Being a prior military family, this is not the first time we have moved to a new state for my husband’s career. In over 20 years of marriage, my husband and I have made ten moves across five states. Six of these moves have included kids. As part of these moves, I have come to love “cleaning out” my house and giving away or donating items we no longer need or use.

When it comes to food, exercise, and my body, my eating disorder mindset of 32 years fights against the “clean out” of the lies it has believed for so long. It tries to convince me that I am safer if I remain in control by adhering to what culture says is acceptable in these areas. Cultural messages that constantly tell me I will find peace and happiness once I attain a certain weight, or keep a certain diet, or pursue a certain exercise plan. It has only been within the last several years when I stumbled across FINDINGbalance and began listening to the Old School F...

By worldly standards, she isn’t pretty or even cute; the world would say she’s big, awkward, and not smart. I have learned many lessons from my friend “Mary”, a woman I called “sister” for no other reason than we both have April birthdays. She's 3 years older than I am, but developmentally she is closer to the age of 8.

Mary had attended my adapted fitness chair exercise class at a community center for many years. One day, we moved into a room with mirrors across the front wall. I asked the class, “Do you like the mirrors?” And Mary chimed that she loves the mirrors, “I like looking at myself”, and as she said those words, my mind raced and I thought-

“Do I like looking at myself? What makes Mary different? What gives her an attitude of joy, instead of dread to see her reflection?”

Later, I asked everyone to move closer to the edge of their chair, and Mary exclaimed, "I can’t because my butt is too boney." I laughed because I hadn't anticipated anyone commenting on my prompt, and...

Just like seasons in nature, there are seasons in life. Sometimes seasons offer safety and predictability, and sometimes they can completely catch us off-guard. The freak snow in April and the hot December day come unexpectedly and disrupt the norm. The same is true in our lives. In my case, it's a prolonged illness that's morphed this summer into something I was not expecting. My visions of day trips with my kids have become hours of watching movies and playing video games. Thoughts of joyfully moving throughout my day have turned into afternoon naps on the couch. It’s not what I wanted for this summer, and that’s difficult. 

In addition to my plans changing, my body has changed too; the lack of movement and the change in my diet have made a difference in how my clothes fit and how I feel in my body. This is more difficult. There was a time a few years ago that this would have set me into a panic. The feeling of being out of control would have consumed me. Not anymore.

My heart i...