Child-Like Innocence (A Halloween Memory)
By worldly standards, she isn’t pretty or even cute; the world would say she’s big, awkward, and not smart. I have learned many lessons from my friend “Mary”, a woman I called “sister” for no other reason than we both have April birthdays. She's 3 years older than I am, but developmentally she is closer to the age of 8.
Mary had attended my adapted fitness chair exercise class at a community center for many years. One day, we moved into a room with mirrors across the front wall. I asked the class, “Do you like the mirrors?” And Mary chimed that she loves the mirrors, “I like looking at myself”, and as she said those words, my mind raced and I thought-
“Do I like looking at myself? What makes Mary different? What gives her an attitude of joy, instead of dread to see her reflection?”
Later, I asked everyone to move closer to the edge of their chair, and Mary exclaimed, "I can’t because my butt is too boney." I laughed because I hadn't anticipated anyone commenting on my prompt, and here she was saying what she was thinking. The negative tape inside my head played, “She thinks her butt is boney, I think my butt is fat.”
Jesus said, “I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children.” - Matthew 11:25
In early October, Mary told me she was dressing as a ballerina for Halloween. I always anticipate the senior center’s annual event because of the costumes. What will the clients “become” for this singular day that you can dress up as who you’d like to be or who you see yourself as? Through the years, I had seen them become kings, princesses, cowboys, and 1960s hippies. And now I looked forward to Mary’s "ballerina".
When I entered the senior center for the party, there was Mary, dressed as a giant hotdog from head to knee, with only her face and arms popping out. And after telling her she looked beautiful, all she wanted was to have a spider painted on her cheek. I obliged her.
Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” -Matthew 19:14
Oh, to be brave, uninhibited, and like a child in how we see ourselves. The time and age before there was judgment, a time when there was only beauty in a mirror; no criticism, only innocence. A time when we were full of hope and anticipation of what God was bringing into our life for the future rather than dreading what we have become today.
For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. -1 Cor. 3:12
- Amy Schaller
FINDINGbalance Outreach Coordinator. FREEdom Blog Editor. Wife, & Mom of an Adult Child. Retired Personal Trainer & Adapted Fitness Instructor. Philanthropist. Novice Ukulele Player. Turkey Lover. Metal Stamper. Overcomer.
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