FREEdom Story: Walking Towards Freedom
As long as I remember, I’ve struggled with body image, and I believed I was fat. I was constantly comparing myself with others, and finding my value in what I believed *they believed* about me.
As I entered high school, I began to make changes that led me down a path of disordered eating.
In January of 2016, I was hospitalized for anorexia nervosa. I spent 7 weeks in the hospital. During this time, I began counseling, often with my parents present. That started the journey of recovery, but I was mostly unwilling on my part; it was forced by my parents and I only consented as long as it enabled me to do what I wanted to do.
I entered a “mostly recovered” state, which I lived in for a long time. This involved extremely strict rules about food and exercise, and an obsession with performance. It may have been healthier than previous behavior, yet still not a healthy way to live.
I certainly was not walking in freedom.
In the fall of 2022, I reached another rock-bottom place. I recognized I needed help and I actually wanted to get better. I started looking for resources.
As a Christian, it was very important to me that whoever I found to help me had the same worldview as I did. I couldn’t find any local options that were faith-based and eating disorder-focused. I came across some in-patient programs across the states and Canada but felt uncertain whether that was something that would work for me, as well as being affordable.
Then I came across FINDINGbalance and their Lasting Freedom online self-study course. I prayed about it and talked to my dad about it. It was affordable and seemed worth a try. Intentionally engaging in the course made a huge difference for me! I would set aside one hour each week to work hard through a module. I still haven’t completed all of the modules as life has gotten very busy and changed a lot, yet I have access to the modules whenever I can or need to go back to them. And I receive the Daily Vitamin emails each day and those help to ground me.
I can say I am certainly living more freely than I was almost 9 years ago when this journey began.
I finished university in the spring of 2023, earning a Bachelor of Science in Agriculture, and I got married in the fall of 2023! My husband and I dairy farm with my parents and have a herd of beef cows. Along with that, I work part-time as a dairy nutritionist.
I still need to rely on God each day, and some days, seasons, and holidays are harder than others. I still need healing from a lot of wounds from the past, and I need frequent reminders of where my worth is; FINDINGbalance provides that through their daily encouragement and the skills I learned in the Lasting Freedom course! Listening to the podcast has also been helpful for me on this journey. And, of course, lots of prayer! I also appreciate so much how quickly anyone I contact at FINDINGbalance gets back to me; they are so encouraging, and, although I have not met them in person, I feel supported when I reach out. And I feel less alone as I work through the program and see so many walking in freedom.
- Allison
Daughter Of The King Of Kings. Redeemed By The Son's Blood. Filled With His Spirit. Gifted With A Unique Purpose In This World Until He Comes Back! Overcomer.
If you need prayer or community while working towards freedom from an eating disorder, disordered eating, or body image issues, we invite you to sign up for our Prayers for Freedom group.
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FINDINGbalance is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization providing non-clinical support and encouragement to those battling food issues. The contents of this blog article, including any attachments, are for educational purposes only and are not intended to diagnose, treat, or prescribe a particular course of action. If you or someone you care about is battling an eating disorder, please seek care from a licensed professional. If you are in crisis and need immediate support, please call, text, or chat 988 to speak with someone at the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, 24/7.
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